Sissy in my Helmet

This is a bit late, but I need to get it out.

Barack Obama’s election to the post of President of the US of A has caused a recurring image to haunt my tiny little mind: Princess Diana’s dead and mangled corpse trapped in the mess of a brutal car wreck.

Mass hysteria is all about and I feel left out. Idiots besiege me; they are in my life, on the net and making stupid toasts the world over. These are the people that I’d normally consider to carry some intelligence and depth. These are my people.

It’s not that I think that I’m clever, far from it, so how can all these people be so dumb?

Whatever skin the man wears, the man is still a politician.

I’m as delighted to see the back of Bush, but that doesn’t make his Democratic replacement the new messiah, and even if it did, what have messiahs brought? For the most part, war.

Afghanistan, enjoy...

Here I am having a nice walk in the Sussex countryside:



The fuss will all die down now. Yay.

It was only 90% dark when I left work. Yay. Yay. Yay.


Fabpants Recommends: There’s so much music I want to recommend I could wet myself. I have been listening to CDs in the mornings and it’s lovely.

Gone is ‘The Today Show’. I’m boycotting the news. I’m living in a different time zone. Gaza all kicked off after I started reading a book about Palestine. The book is set in the early nineties. I need to stick with the rave years for now. Otherwise, my book reading will get confused. I will catch up with current affairs later. If anything happens that I need to know IMMEDIATELY, please let me know. Otherwise, shhh.

My morning CDs are not fresh releases. They are heavily vetted items, considered worthy of purchase. Here are the two that have been getting me up for the past week.

Deerhoof – Friend Opportunity (2007)
It’s old, but gold. Here’s a sample for you:

Download MP3: Deerhoof - 81 (courtesy of krs5rc.com)




Radar Bros. – Auditorium (2008)
This album was bought at their lovely Brighton gig. Taste it with me and dream:

Download MP3: Radar Bros. - Warm Rising Sun (courtesy of mineorecords.com)




Download MP3: Radar Bros. - Hearts of Crows (courtesy of mineorecords.com)



Download MP3: Radar Bros. - Happy Spirits (courtesy of mineorecords.com)




Loney Dear – Dear John
As for 2009, Loney Dear is back with the album ‘Dear John’. Oh me oh my, new Loney Dear. Please play the UK again Mr Loney Dear.

Download MP3: Loney Dear - Airport Surroundings (courtesy of spin.com)




Download MP3: Loney Dear - I Was Only Going Out (courtesy of idisk.mac.com)




M Ward - Hold Time

M Ward is about to release ‘Hold Time’ and it’s everywhere after being played in full on NPR Music. It’s sweetly wonderful. I’m particularly enchanted by the cover of ‘Rave On’. I love Buddy Holly, and listen to him on my MP3 player when on long journeys. He always cheers my rotten old heart.

Download MP3: M. Ward - For Beginners (courtesy of kickinthepeanuts.com)




Download MP3: M. Ward - Never Had Nobody Like You (pathfinderpat.files.wordpress.com)




Download MP3: M. Ward - Jailbird (courtesy of puddlegum.net)




Download MP3: M. Ward - Hold Time (courtesy of jamsbio.com)




Download MP3: Buddy Holly – Rave On (courtesy of fusion45.com)




Marissa Nadler - Little Hells

For the future, I am 100% looking forward to Marissa Nadler’s new album. Eee. Eee. Eee. In the meantime, I’m enjoying her blog and this escapee track:

Download MP3: Marissa Nadler - River of Dirt (courtesy of kemado.com)




As for new finds, Brontosaurus Chorus is a band I stumbled across whilst following a winding internet path into strange new lands. They have the makings of something rather good.

Download MP3: Brontosaurus Chorus - The Myth of Love (sorry, this link has died)



Finally, here’s a song for cyclist like me. This song intrigues me. It takes you on a very long and weird journey that is sometimes nearly good, sometimes fucking awful, but strangely fascinating. More than anything, I just want to share the experience. Be disturbed:

Download MP3: The Grave Architects – The Bike Song (sorry, this link has died)



There is more, so much more music, but that’s it for now. As a parting note, I really wanted to give you the track ‘Petty Sessions’ from Half Man Half Biscuit, but I’m a bandwidth thief and no one else is hosting it. Truly, I have searched, and searched and searched.

Gig Review: Saturday Night is Boogie Night

of Montreal and CasioKids, Digital Brighton, 24th January 2009

It’s Saturday night, it’s 10.46pm and I’m at home. I love early gigs. They are THE absolute best. They involve less waiting around, the stage turnaround has to be tight, there’s more time to banter afterwards and, if you like, you can return home before you're ready to drop. We walked home along the beach. It was very lovely.

of Montreal certainly know how to put on a show, and if anyone ever dares to say that they don’t put the effort in, they’ll be shot at dawn.

When I saw that ‘of Montreal’ were playing Brighton, all those moons ago, I was delighted. ‘Hissing Fauna, Are You the Destroyer?’ is a brilliant album, and the idea of bouncing about to it at a gig, on a Saturday night no less, had my vote.

In October, their ninth studio album ‘Skeletal Lamping’ came out, and shortly after buying my ticket, I got a listen in. ‘Hmmmm’ I thought. I lived in hope that their eighth album would fill the live show.

The question should have been ‘what doesn’t fill the live show?’ I had no reason for doubt.

Even the stage manager, sound-check dude, wore a suit. of Montreal were introduced to the audience by a tall man in a giant tiger mask, who would later eat a small gimp’s crotch. Yes, you read that right.

With a film running in the background, Kevin Barnes looked suitably glam, with sparkling blue eye make-up and a gloriously frilly shirt. The shirt changed colour and style mid-set, but was no less ‘Prince Charming’. Bryan Poole hid behind rock star shades and the rest of the band hid behind the front men and a post. They are a band that like to hide. They hide behind make-up, costumes and structural necessities.

One man had more apparel than most. The gimp was more than a sex toy. He was the moustachioed muscle man of a million masks. Trotting on and off stage in outfit after outfit, he put as much effort in as the band. And the band were slick. SLICK SLICK SLICK.

The one and a half hour set could have been trimmed to maintain momentum, but otherwise the performance was faultless; perfect singing, polished segues, and relentless pace.

Like me, the audience seemed happiest with songs from the ninth album. For these tracks, they did dance. For the rest they shuffled and swayed.

Download MP3: of Montreal - Suffer For Fashion (courtesy of saladdaysmusic.net)




Download MP3: of Montreal - Heimdalsgate Like A Promethean Curse (courtesy of saladdaysmusic.net)




Download MP3: of Montreal - A Sentence of Sorts in Kongsvinger (courtesy of indierockcafe.com)



The encore, a cover of Nirvana’s ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’, was played and received with marvellous jolly rapture. Never much of a Nirvana fan, I must say that it was far better than the original, with a pumping rhythm and great vocals.

Casiokids in the support slot were FUN. They are not kids though; they have wrinkles! Casiokids are from Norway and they have just released this little number:

Download MP3: Casiokids - Grønt lys i alle ledd (courtesy of magnetmagazine.com)



Norway is where Kevin Barnes of 'of Montreal' sings that he lived on the verge of a total breakdown. I wonder if he met the Casiokids there. It's not all black metal bands.

Fabpants Recommends: I came across a band that reminded me of Foals. As this is a bit of a dance themed post, let’s hear ‘em. This is Rogues:

Download MP3: Rogues - Not So Pretty (courtesy of theburningear.com)

Gig Review: Little Joy in This Town

Gush gush gush. That feels better.

The week just gone. It started with a supermarket singsong – tum te tum – there was a moment that my legs were not my own – eek – and it ended somewhere lewd – oh Emily, not again.

An extendable glow stick willie, held aloft by two squishy ‘happy birthday’ balls broke the finish line. Willie, balls, balloons and sticks, suck on this. Ah, push it. Push it real good.

Oooh, baby, baby. Baby, baby.

Yeah. You know how it goes.

Adorned with American corporate logos and a drawing of the Stars and Stripes defaced with 'God Fuck America', a right sight I must have looked. The bright glowing penis grew ever longer and forcibly invaded space. I’m not sure if that’s a metaphor or not.

Yesterday, making fresh marks on a new calendar, I established that I’ll be celebrating many Saturdays this year. And on the sixth day, we will celebrate the anniversary of life. Mine comes in March. A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat and all that. Pick a Saturday, send a card.

For the anniversary of Brown, I was on Nurofen Plus. It almost did the job. Pleasure and pain can live side by side, each on its own path. It's been a funny old week.

Out of contract, the victim of a funding crisis endemic to the charity sector, I've been taking what I can get. Jobs, invites and holidays alike. Take them while they’re there. Spend while you can. The future’s white; the future’s so bright it’ll melt your eyeballs.

In the inpatients hospital, in town and in the impoverished east, I am covering anyone on holiday, sick or with money to spare. People on locked wards or in the community alike have had me this week. I’m everywhere; clocking up saddle time as my feet spin me across town and my income stays, for the moment, intact.

The cycling’s not to blame for my out-of-leg experience. That was pure nerves. The tension of ten people taking on a new challenge, myself included, stole my limbs. Performing one from last, the atmosphere became part of me.

Smiling I took my place and made words. I didn’t collapse and sentences formed.

All the same, it took three hours for the after effect of fear to stop pulsating around my body.

I fear that fear is contagious.

In another place, and at another time, it could be quite different.

I may tell you about SafeTalk one day, when I’m a fully certified trainer, with three deliveries under my belt. Another route to another income. I need them all.

I charge too little for my self-employed work and I’m clinging onto my employer like a desperate leach. It’s hard to leave a job that you love. Only the lonely, ever the depressed, often the angry, and sometimes the psychotic, you are welcome to my guidance. You and all the rest. I’m surprisingly mentally stable, yet to become a one in four. Actually, I'm not surprised, but you might be. ***One in four of us will experience a mental health problem at some point in our lives.

Little Joy, Audio Live Lounge, 15th January 2009

I cannot express the great honour I felt to see Little Joy, this Thursday, in a tiny toilet circuit venue. This is the band that, according to Glastonbury Festival’s true lovechild, Emily Eavis, made THE best album of 2008.

Fabrizio Moretti has undisputedly proven himself. He is a man of taste, talent and rhythm. Little Joy’s debut is the best work that any of The Strokes have produced since 'Is This It'. At times, the tracks serve to remind me of the finesse that 'that band' once had, circa 2001. The songs are tight and Rodrigo Amarante’s singing style is easily comparable to Julian Casablancas’. Yet, it's not a one-directional feast of middle-class urban indie jangle. Instead, it draws on global sun-soaked influences from Brazil and further afield.

Live, they are far better than The Strokes. I saw the latter’s stiff stage performances and I know.

We are welcomed with a soft and beautiful acoustic number, sung in Portuguese. Evaporar is the last track on the album, and the first track of the night. Setting the tone for an enchanting evening, Rodrigo Amarante captivates the room.

Since the day I first heard her voice, Binki Shapiro has reminded me of Nico. Remember 'These Days'? “I've been out walking, I don't do too much talking”. I love that song so very much.

As Binky Shapiro sings 'Don’t Watch Me Dancing' or 'Unattainable', a black and white image of Nico forms in my mind. Shapiro’s voice needs little accompaniment. It’s a delight to behold. As the sounds of 'sshhhhh' dampens down the drunken 'I’m just here to see a famous person' crowd, the rest of us float adrift on her every word.

Download MP3: Nico – These Days (courtesy of theyellowstereo.com)




Download MP3: Little Joy – Unattainable (courtesy of mineorecords.com)




Like true indie bands on tour, the support act ‘The Dead Trees’ and ‘Little Joy’ are as one. The Dead Trees members gradually appear on stage, until a super band stands before us. It works. It sounds fantastic. The Dead Trees? They were promising. If they drop the guitar masturbation and tighten up their songs, they could be quite something. At times, I was impressed.

Fabpants Recommends: In the summer of 2007, I had the great pleasure of seeing ‘Hello Saferide’ at Latitude Festival. This winter, I have spent much time listening to their 2008 release ‘More Modern Short Stories from Hello Saferide’. Here's a little sample for you:

Download MP3: Hello Saferide - 2008 (courtesy of keenplan.kilu.de)

Some Posts Are Better Than Others

"Fucking Hell", she screamed.

The world’s energy supplies couldn’t heat the flat. Getting out of the bath was a frozen shock.

In conclusion, the icicles and the ice-rink are an improvement, even if I did nearly fall. Damn overflow pipe positioning. Right above our front door.

Two different stories merged into one.

Fabpants Recommends: While he may be a complete thief, at least he admits it. He is Pelle Carlberg. His album The Lilac Time is worth a pop. The lyrics are not to Belle and Sebastian standards and it is a royal rip off, but it sounds nice. I dunno, is that enough?

Download MP3: Pelle Carlberg - 1983 (Pelle & Sebastian) (courtesy of pitchforkmedia.com)




Download MP3: Pelle Carlberg - Because I‘m Worth It (sorry, this link has died)


For those of you that hate the NME and MySpace, check out Pete Green. He hates MySpace, he hates the NME, but he likes snow. He has songs available on his website: Pete Green

Download MP3: Pete Green - Best British Band Supported by Shockwaves




After a delicious meal of anti-corporate angst, I like some youthful optimism. That’ll be the NME then. I know I shouldn’t, but I do like a bit of pudding sometimes.

MySpace produces some of the ugliest pages on the internet, but it’s great for working out what gigs to go to.

I’m not so sure about Pete Green, but I do like sharing.

Dandelion Radio

During a long hot summer, I lay inside a small brown tent, for as long as the day would let me. Patient in isolation, I was happy. The oppressive, canvas-baked heat offered me with the space and privacy to be just me, away from the thoughts and actions of others, and away from my own mistakes. It was liberating and I felt a great sense of freedom. I slept, listened to the radio and read trashy teenage novels; the latter left behind with the heat. I would hold onto my urine for hours, as not to break the spell. If I had joined the worldview of ‘Sweet Valley High’, I would have represented a triumph for my siblings: a real-life embodiment of ‘Sandy’ from Grease. I read the books because they were there, and I was lazy, but my personality was stiff.

I was no goody-two-shoes, and without the aspiration to become the village bike, I was conforming for no one.

Instead of metamorphosing into a pre-teenage slut, I discovered a place of depth that would mark me forever. The only Sindy toy I had truly loved was my Sindy Radio. It looked like a plastic miniature dressing table, but had a socket for a mono earplug. It played AM stations only. I loved listening to it and took it to bed each night. I loved it because it was a radio. It was a very poor radio, in shape, sound and scope, but it worked. I had no interest in dolls, their paraphernalia or their clothes. Unless they could eat, shit or wee to gross comic effect, then they were of no use to me.

By the age of ten, my sister and I were the proud owners of our first real radio. Tuned into the ‘Golden Hour’, in my canvas hide-away, a couple of songs marked me so deeply, that even though I never bought them - I wouldn’t have known how - they appeared in my mind at the strangest of times, and do to this day. They simply sang out from a sea of cheese flavoured pop and greasy commentary.

Those songs were Leonard Cohen’s 'Suzanne' and Don McLean's 'Vincent'.

The songs that I knew the best, at the start of my second decade, were those that my three sisters had fallen for. They were played or sung continuously, and were radio favourites too. They were not the songs that moved my heart.

I told no one about my discoveries, my secret songs. I kept them away from a world that might defile them. They lived inside my head and I made a conscious decision to keep them there. Despite their national popularity, I knew no one else that spoke of them.

At high school, already listening to the radio every night at bedtime, I retreated earlier and earlier to the privacy of my room. There, I created a happy existence that was mine, and mine alone. The more radio I listened to, the more my heart soared. I never did any homework; I rarely had. I drifted, I dreamt and I wrote letters to distant friends. I ate sweets secretly smuggled into my room.

Before long, as well as an expert on chart music, and copious tracks that I internally criticised with glee, I was a John Peel love child. His passion created many of us, dutiful followers of great music, with an insatiable appetite, some of us for life. He was a friend in hard times and he was a friend until he died. The music we shared together, or he shared with me, helped me to find like-minded souls, respect and friends.

While he is no longer here, I am far from alone in my continuing love for the man that I started to fear losing some seventeen years before his death, and some years after I first made his acquaintance.

Although his absence has forced me to do much more of my own research – and listen to many more inadequate songs – the internet does provide.

I miss his voice.

One of the best gap fillers of all is Dandelion Radio. It’s an online station, set up in honour of John Peel, and it’s run by volunteers. It’s a real treat to listen to and a true homage.

There are moments when I have been cruel and unkind.

Fabpants Recommends: The Festive Fifty is being aired daily on Dandelion Radio until the end of January 2009.

Here’s the top ten:
1. The Fall - 50 Year Old Man Download MP3 (courtesy of musiclikedirt.com)




2. Das Wanderlust – Puzzle (sorry, this link has died)


3. Decoration - Square Mile Listen to MP3

4. MGMT - Time To Pretend Download MP3 (courtesy of ohmyrockness.com)




5. Ste McCabe - Huyton Scum (sorry, this link has died)



6. The Container Drivers - It Must Be The Pipes (sorry, this link has died)



7. The Fall - Wolf Kidult Man (sorry, this link has died)



8. The Deirdres - Milk Is Politics (sorry, this link has died)



9. The Hillfields – Spoon (sorry, this link has died)



10. Beatnik Filmstars - Hospital Ward (sorry, this link has died)



Not convinced, well neither am I, but that’s not the point. We can’t all agree.

In my book, it’s often the tracks further down the list that are special. I never have been The Fall’s greatest fan. Unfortunately, Dandelion Radio’s listeners are probably a bit old, so the Festive Fifty may reflect this. Peel would no doubt add that the list includes too many white boys with guitars.

All the same, heads up to the tracks by MGMT, Ste McCabe and Beatnik Filmstars.

The Hillfields and Decoration both pleasantly embody the sound of late 80s indie-pop. The Dierdres track reminds me of ‘Los Campesinos’ at their best. These all get my approval, even if they wouldn't be in my top ten.

Lastly, I’ll give you number 11


Download MP3: The Lovely Eggs – Have You Ever Heard A Digital Accordion? (sorry, this link has died)



Indeed, the eggs are lovely. This track tops any of the top ten.

To hear the rest, you need to head to Dandelion Radio. Please do. My remaining favourites are tracks from Holy Fuck, Fuck Buttons, MGMT and Sigur Rós.

If you were wondering, Half Man Half Biscuit do feature. Could it be a Festive Fifty without them?

Gig Review: Colin is a Pussy, A Very Pretty Pussy

Future of the Left, Monto Water Rats, 31st December 2008

Quite surprisingly, for the first time in my ridiculously short live, I welcomed the New Year in whilst watching a band. Yeah baby. Yeah. 'Bout time.

Future of the Left were fantastically grumpy. The grumpier they got, the more I smiled. By the end, I was grinning like an E-head. It was quite wonderful.

Praise be to the band that asks for the smoke machines to be turned off. Indeed, Future of the Left are not Slade, they are not Poison and they are not Whitesnake. They are what they are. They are fucking cool.

If, in an act of cantankerous defiance, Future of the Left had played through the countdown to 2009, it would have been perfect.

It was close enough.

I also saw support acts Supernova, Muswell and Shakers in The Dark. That’s all I’m going to say about that. I had a very lovely evening.

Fabpants Recommends: Optimism.

Download MP3: Future of the Left – Manchasm (courtesy of merryswankster.com)




And, for those of you that like to jig along to unoriginal, but rather jolly, folk rock:

Download MP3: Spirit of the West - Another Happy New Year (sorry, this link has died)



The lyrics are rather apt.