Not as Green as I am Cabbage Looking

I have a personal rule. I don’t own a car and I have a limit of hiring one three times a year. Brrm brrrm. Beep beep. Yeah.

In 2008, I hired a car twice: once to see Granny Fabpants in Staffordshire and once to travel across Malawi with my brother. I’ve decided to end my car hire for the year there. Christmas will be by train. There were debates, and there was research, but the decision is final. The train won. Choo choo. Mind the gap. Yeah.

Despite setting us back £109, travelling by train is still cheaper than hiring a car, plus fuel, and it’s the ethical thing to do. Cars kill the planet and give children asthma. They also nearly kill me each morning. Fucking school run.

It’ll mostly be a car free Christmas, but it won’t be sanctimonious

While, I do my bit for the environment, I am the first to admit that it’s not enough. I may buy trees in exchange for flights, opt for green electricity, and bicycle – in a permanent state of fear - about town, but...

...I live in a shitty rented flat, where the wind blows hard through rotten window frames and the heating is caught in an eternal battle to keep us warm. I’m always leaving the hob on by accident and I like baths. I like baths a lot. I was the sole cause of the great water shortage of 2005. Crops died while I bathed. If the flat burns down because the hob has been left on, I’ll probably be in the bath.

Over the years, my extensive knowledge of environmental matters has fallen by the way. I know that agreements to save the world from climate change were on shaky ground last week. UN climate talks in Poland had European leaders rubbing their heads. One by one, their commitments became fewer and it became increasingly hard to save appearances. As usual, they wanted to look like the great environmental saviours of the West, with superhero capes and CO2 reduction sabers, but doing bugger bollocks all is, as ever, so much easier. Shift responsibility, trade emissions and build more runways. Running away is always a good option.

Who wants to invest in saving the world, when financial collapse is likely to eat us in our sleep and the ever-expensive pistachio nut is threatening to become a unit of currency?

Perhaps we all do. Want to see the solution to all our woes? Well, read ‘A Green New Deal’ and prepare yourself for a treat.

You can download a PDF of it here:
A Green New Deal

Don’t give a shit? Think that climate change is a myth? Sure that we’ll find a new planet to trash pretty soon? Who cares? Well, read it anyway. Why? Because it has the best summary of the 2008 financial collapse that I’ve yet to encounter. You can always read the ‘Financial Crunch’ section and ignore the rest.

I also really enjoyed this article:
The 10 big energy myths by Chris Goodall

Fabpants Recommends:

Download MP3: The Lovely Eggs - Tyrannosaurus Rex for Christmas (sorry, this link has died)


Find it on Cherryade Records: Cherryade - A Very Cherry Christmas volume 4